E harmony recently released the results of a survey which predicted that by 2031 50% of all couples would meet online. With the current surge in popularity of the dating app, for singles who are ready to mingle, communicating virtually is the language of modern love.
If you are lucky enough to actually meet IRL, arranging your date will most likely be hashed out on Whatsapp or discussed by text. Making a good first impression in those early conversations isn’t an opportunity that will repeat itself. A make or break situation, long messages or ill-timed responses can portray you in an unfavourable light. So, how best should questions be worded, compliments be given and emojis peppered in? Authenticity along with good humour and the ability to listen and show compassion score highly when it comes to desirability, in the case of both sexes. A huge turn off for all sexes of every age is desperation and an over-eagerness to comply, agree or please is a number one no-no.
- Opening conversations with new potential love interests should be short but sweet. Never underestimate the impact of a cute good morning greeting or a thoughtful ‘sleep well’ sign off. These messages should be sent with no expectation of a response but should allow your crush to believe that you think of them first thing in the morning or last thing at night. Introducing a morning greeting and evening goodnight routine also introduces a familiarity that may lead to bonding.
- Do not send pictures of yourself without being prompted or asked to do so. Familiarising yourself with your new love interest prematurely is as much of a turn off as entirely ignoring them. Keep a little mystery between the two of you. By all means send an image of a serene landscape or a beloved pet, but a stream of selfies can insecurity and also puts pressure on your potential partner to send a selfie back, which may make them feel uncomfortable.
- Create your own emoji language. Most couples who communicate via their phones have specific emojis they use to represent their mood and themselves. Try to be positive and keep the mood light. Emojis are a simple and cute way to share an in-joke! Avoid ‘LOL’ or ‘ha-ha’. Your phone emoji dictionary communicates precisely just how funny something is, from a range of smirks to crying smiles. Pick your guy! (put in laughing emojis here)
- Don’t swear. Profanities are a lazy form of expression. Use the extra time and space you have chatting from behind your phone to really think about your message and demonstrate it eloquently. Swearing feels aggressive and too commonly raises a red flag.
- Avoid talk of ex’s. Wipe the slate clean, dust away the cobwebs and rewrite the script, this could be your last chance to achieve that fairytale ending you always dreamed of. Talking of partners past sends signals there may be feelings for that ex still lingering somewhere.